THREE HUNDRED and SIXTY-FIVE DAYS

Today marks the one-year anniversary of our  Forever Family - Gotcha Day or Family Day as so many people in the adoption community have dubbed it.

So I began thinking of the all the things we've been through and seen in the last year.

365

• the number of days we've been the #peterspartyoffive
• the number of nights we've tucked a blonde-hair, blue-eyed girl in bed and listened to her pray for "no bad dreams"
• the number of days I've had a daughter and been able to brush her hair and attempt hair bows, pony-tails and braids.
• the number of times we have failed at parenting a traumatized child
• the number of times of God has reminded us that "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." 2 Corinthians 12:9
• the number of times we've heard "This is not my real family."
• the number of times God has reminded us that LOVE makes a family, not flesh and bone
• the number of times we've heard "I hate you." or "I don't like you, not even one little bit."
• the number of times God has whispered "I have loved you with an everlasting love." Jeremiah 31:3
• the number of mornings we have had to put our "YES" back on the table
• the number of times God has shown us "His mercies never come to an end, they are new every morning." Lamentations 3:22-23
• the number of emergency calls and texts I've made when we've been in the midst of an out-of-control fit of rage, asking faithful friends to pray for us to make it through
• the number of times God has been faithful to his promise of "Call to me and I will answer you...." Jeremiah 33:3
• the number of days we've prayed for God to heal the broken heart of a nine year old girl.
• the number of times that God has reminded us that "I know the plans I have for KB, plans to prosper her, not to harm her, to give her a hope and a future."           Jeremiah 29:11

Adoption is hard.
It's hard on the child, who had to lose so much, in order to gain a new family.
It's hard on the ones who desperately try to love a child, who is terrified of letting someone into their lives again, for fear of experiencing more rejection or abandonment.
It's hard on the friends and family members, who want to be able to "fix it" but cannot.

While the past 365 days for us can be summarized by that one word, HARD. We know that God remains faithful to his promises, like Deuteronomy 31:6 "Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the LORD your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you."

As we look toward tomorrow, day 366, and beyond. We cling to the hope in God's word that Steven Curtis Chapman sings of in his song, Glorious Unfolding.

Lay your head down tonight
Take a rest from the fight
Don’t try to figure it out
Just listen to what I’m whispering to your heart
‘Cause I know this is not
Anything like you thought
The story of your life was gonna be
And it feels like the end has started closing in on you
But it’s just not true
There’s so much of the story that’s still yet to unfold

And this is going to be a glorious unfolding
Just you wait and see and you will be amazed
You’ve just got to believe the story is so far from over
So hold on to every promise God has made to us
And watch this glorious unfolding

God’s plan from the start
For this world and your heart
Has been to show His glory and His grace
Forever revealing the depth and the beauty of
His unfailing Love
And the story has only begun

And this is going to be a glorious unfolding
Just you wait and see and you will be amazed
We’ve just got to believe the story is so far from over
So hold on to every promise God has made to us
And watch this glorious unfolding

We were made to run through fields of forever
Singing songs to our Savior and King
So let us remember this life we’re living
Is just the beginning of the beginning

Of this glorious unfolding
We will watch and see and we will be amazed
If we just keep on believing the story is so far from over
And hold on to every promise God has made to us
We’ll see the glorious unfolding

Just watch and see (unfolding)
This is just the beginning of the beginning (unfolding)

Praying for the day we see the Glorious Unfolding of God's story in her life!

God always writes the BEST stories, and her's is not over yet. 

Made to THRIVE

As I reflect upon the past year, I cannot help but have mixed emotions. 

The year started with our hearts being full of concern for our oldest son, whose arm had been numb for several months without a clear explanation as to why.  We were certain it had to do with football, an injury or accident during practice, perhaps.  We only knew that after many doctors and tests and a trip to Mayo Clinic, he still didn't have feeling below the elbow and no one could tell him (or us), when or if it would return.  Praise God that just as physical therapy was ending, the feeling slowly began to return and within a few weeks, he had full feeling once again.  When it was time for Spring practices, he was ready to return to the field. 

We should have know then that God was going to be doing BIG things in our lives.

The year quickly unfolded into the most overwhelming, uncertain and rewarding year we have seen. 
 
It's been difficult.

It's been exhausting.

It's been draining.

It's been full of worry and doubt.

It's been heart wrenching.

It's been trying.

It's been HARD. 

And it's been worth it all.  Not because we are super heroes or saints, but because God has done amazing things in our hearts, our home, our family.

As we head into a new year, we know with certainty that those difficult, exhausting, draining, heart wrenching, trying and really hard times are not over.  Our desire is not to see them vanish, but to see God in them, to reflect Him and allow His light to shine through us. 

So, here it is, our song for 2015.  The lyrics have been playing over in my mind for several weeks now and I believe that God is trying to sow a fresh perspective in how I look at the challenges that lie ahead. 

Here in this worn and weary land
Where many a dream has died

Like a tree planted by the water
We never will run dry

So living water flowing through
God we thirst for more of You
Fill our hearts and flood our souls
With one desire

Just to know You and
To make You known
We lift Your name on High
Shine like the sun make darkness run and hide
We know we were made for so much more
Than ordinary lives
It's time for us to more than just survive
We were made to thrive
Into Your word we're digging deep
To know our Father's heart

Into the world we're reaching out
To show them who You are

So living water flowing through
God we thirst for more of You
Fill our hearts and flood our souls
With one desire

Just to know You and
To make You known
We lift Your name on High
Shine like the sun make darkness run and hide
We know we were made for so much more
Than ordinary lives
It's time for us to more than just survive
We were made to thrive
Joy Unspeakable, Faith Unsinkable, Love Unstoppable, Anything is possible
Joy Unspeakable, Faith Unsinkable, Love Unstoppable, Anything is possible
Joy Unspeakable, Faith Unsinkable, Love Unstoppable, Anything is possible
Joy Unspeakable, Faith Unsinkable, Love Unstoppable, Anything is possible

Just to know You and
To make You known
We lift Your name on High
Shine like the sun make darkness run and hide
We know we were made for so much more
Than ordinary lives
It's time for us to more than just survive
We were made to thrive

  We were made to Thrive

--Casting Crowns "Thrive"